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So Hatred

from by Soilent Green

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a cold cast thought...
shattered and numb
i've got this system in my head
standards and notions
of my own death
kill me... i've already killed myself
(a thousand times)
a devil speaks to disguise my eyes
so you cannot see
the knowledge of unkind
inflict selfish ways to under mind trust
stepped on only to be stepped upon
wishful thought to smooth out
high tempers in need
a doll an image for wrath to unleash...
the aggressor
helpless... help yourself
stop being there for everyone else
feeding the fake
take their medicine to feel good
frustration to the point of anger
no sympathy for your way
lying on the drugstore floor
an arm injected mind fuck
for the weak and impossible
damn the cause... fuck the reasons
hate everyone... hate everything
hate yourself for disrespect
a martyr for your self-gain
beginning to numb myself
murdering morals for power
repeating the past
in the form of consequences
instigate a broken will to think
treason of feelings spread wide
preaching problems... you're the problem
lose your stable temperance
flake-out on situations
another taste of sinful indulgence
take-out on yourself
take notice...
no sense of accomplishment
stop making blame
don't want to rely on someone else
stop pointing ones to shame
the hands of time will strangle you
unless you run
left behind to cry
about what could have been
demand trust and lied to earn it
grasp your actions before they react too fast
control... a tool that discipline maintains
swim oceans of pain...
to drown in hatred


from Sewn Mouth Secrets, released October 6, 1998



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